Friday, December 27, 2013

Actual Messages I Have Received on OKCupid (part 1)

I joined OKCupid about a month ago because despite the fact that I am not worried about being able to find someone I like on my own, I have very little experience actually going on dates and I felt like it would be a good way to make up for lost time. The actual meeting people experiment is still in progress, and there will eventually be a post about it, but in the meantime I wanted to share a few examples of what some people on this site think is a good way to get a lady's attention. I have already deleted QUITE a few thus far but I wanted to record these for posterity before I delete the rest. I'd also like to add that some of these are duplicates of similar messages. I currently have 58 messages which say something along the lines of "hello how are you" along with a passing reference to something in my profile.

Names have been removed to protect the oblivious:

Dec 27, 2013 – 9:25pm
Hi! 

I'll be brief, and perhaps a breath of fresh air in that I'll also be forward, but not gross in my forwardness- I think you're very attractive, and you seem like a cool person, and I'd really like to hang out sometime in a date-like capacity and get to know you. 

If you're interested, and technically even if you're not, I'm (name removed)!
Generally, if you use the phrase "breath of fresh air" in any self-referential context I am not interested in knowing more.
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Hi gorgeous
OH MY GOD WHEN CAN WE MEET I AM SO INTRIGUED I MUST UNDRESS IN FRONT OF YOU IMMEDIATELY
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Well! I...actually don't send many messages anymore, but I am curious about you. So there is that. : ) Hi! 
I…actually don't know why you would think this approach would work.
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Hey, 

Happy holidays! Just wanted to drop you a line since we have a lot in common. Love jazz, and reading as well. Just finished The Casual Vacancy by J.K.Rowling, which was okay. Have you read anything good recently? 

Hope you are having a good holiday! What have you been up to? Wanted to catch Anchorman 2 today, but it was sold out. 
I feel mean shitting on this one because he is obviously making an effort to write the right thing, but there is something so sad about it. You read a book that was only OK and failed to see a movie? If this is the kind of information you chose to include in your VERY FIRST interaction with someone then I have to assume that your life is a nightmare.
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soo why would we be 21% enemies for?lol
I don't know where to start with this.
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So when are we going out?
Very bold, sir. But if it were that easy neither of us would be on this website.
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From what I have been able to read from your profile it seem like you have never dated a Caribbean guy who likes the arts, loves to travel, speak French, and like salsa dancing? 
I think you are a cutie and we would have a great time if we get to know each other and stuff but I wouldn’t wait too long before I am off the market. lol… just playing. 
I feel like the undertone here is "you seem like you've only dated white guys." This happens to be true but my profile doesn't actually SAY that, so I'm offended.
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hi, can we talk?
I know what you're trying to get across, but phrased this way I feel like you're already breaking up with me.
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You must get a lot of attention, don't you?
This particular user had no picture and no profile information and his listed age was 50 :-(
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Nice melons
This was the second message I ever received. Although I did not respond, I cherish it. 
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